Our Own Language
People who have been together along time, know each other very well. I know some people who can correctly finish each other’s sentences, or can tell what the other person wants to have for dinner by looking at their eyelids. More common, I think, is the tendency to create words or phrases based on shared experiences, which make no sense to other people. I guess it’s similar to the “Acronym Speak” that our 12 year old uses. Have you been introduced to this language yet? We are told things like “JK, mom”, to which my response is “Huh?”. My son, then SIGHS, rolls his eyes, and translates “just kidding, mom”. Now, maybe it’s me, but is it really shorter to say “JK”, rather than “just kidding”? I mean, it’s only ONE LESS syllable! Or maybe during all my years of talking, I just never realized how taxing our verbal language is. Maybe I should teach my children sign language. At least then they wouldn’t talk while they were eating! And since the 12 year old is using this New Speak, it must be very cool, so the 7 year old wants in on it too. As she was being tucked into bed one night, her dad was urging her to get to sleep promptly, because of some upcoming activity the next day. She rolled over toward the wall, and grumbled “no period”. My husband was understandably perplexed, and thinking that he had misunderstood her, asked her to repeat herself. She rolled back over to face him and enunciated “No Period”. Well, dad couldn’t for the life of him, figure out why she didn’t want any periods. And what did punctuation have to do with the next days’ activities? He pressed her for an explanation, and realized that what she was saying, was “No” (she didn’t want to participate in the upcoming activity being discussed), and “Period”, meaning that the conversation was over, and she wasn’t going to discuss it anymore! Can you BELIEVE it? My husband was, to say the least, flabbergasted! It is one of the few times I’ve ever seen him speechless!
Anyway, I think people with a common history create phrases similar to this Acronym Speak, only not nearly as annoying! My husband and I use the phrase “that’s like the German Chocolate cake” when we are talking to each other. It’s a phrase that means absolutely nothing to anyone else, but to us, it not only explains a mistaken notion that one of us has, but it conveys the loving, good-hearted intentions behind that notion.
It all began the first year of our married life that we actually lived together. When we got married, my husband was serving in the Air Force, and I was finishing college. One month after our wedding, my husband was sent overseas for a 1 year remote tour, meaning without spouse or family. So our second year of married life, was actually the first year that we lived together.
We had been stationed out in the Midwest, where the weather was cold and the people were warm. It was a primarily agricultural area, and since I had just received my degree in computers and education, I had found it very hard to find a job. When my husband’s birthday came around, I had just found a job, and was determined to make this an unforgettable birthday for the man I loved! I made reservations at a very nice restaurant, and went to the bakery to pick out a cake. As I looked at the numerous choices, my eyes fell upon the German Chocolate cake. The price was considerably more than the others, especially with the extra decorations I wanted, and I don’t care for German Chocolate cake, but I just knew that it was my honey’s favorite. So as I paid for my purchase, I mentally adjusted that month’s budget in my mind, knowing that the look on his face would make it all worthwhile. I left the cake at the restaurant where we would be dining, with their assurance that it would be presented at the completion of our meal that evening.
Well my husband was definitely thrilled with the evening I had planned, and we had a wonderful dinner celebrating his birthday and my new employment. After dinner, just as they had promised, the restaurant staff brought my special, made-to-order, paid-extra-for, cake to the table, complete with candles and singing. My husband beamed, kissed and hugged me, and then cut the cake. With a piece in front of each of us, we sat and looked at them. Then we looked at each other, and back at the pieces of cake. I lovingly told him that although I didn’t care for German Chocolate cake, I knew he loved it, and to go ahead and eat it. He seemed to freeze. He slowly turned his head towards me and asked “I love it?”
“Of course, it’s your favorite, and I’ll be happy just to watch you enjoy yourself” I replied, confident that he would adore my selfless show of love.
“But, Honey,” he stammered, hesitantly, “I don’t even like German Chocolate cake!”
And so “that’s like the German Chocolate cake” was born.
Anyway, I think people with a common history create phrases similar to this Acronym Speak, only not nearly as annoying! My husband and I use the phrase “that’s like the German Chocolate cake” when we are talking to each other. It’s a phrase that means absolutely nothing to anyone else, but to us, it not only explains a mistaken notion that one of us has, but it conveys the loving, good-hearted intentions behind that notion.
It all began the first year of our married life that we actually lived together. When we got married, my husband was serving in the Air Force, and I was finishing college. One month after our wedding, my husband was sent overseas for a 1 year remote tour, meaning without spouse or family. So our second year of married life, was actually the first year that we lived together.
We had been stationed out in the Midwest, where the weather was cold and the people were warm. It was a primarily agricultural area, and since I had just received my degree in computers and education, I had found it very hard to find a job. When my husband’s birthday came around, I had just found a job, and was determined to make this an unforgettable birthday for the man I loved! I made reservations at a very nice restaurant, and went to the bakery to pick out a cake. As I looked at the numerous choices, my eyes fell upon the German Chocolate cake. The price was considerably more than the others, especially with the extra decorations I wanted, and I don’t care for German Chocolate cake, but I just knew that it was my honey’s favorite. So as I paid for my purchase, I mentally adjusted that month’s budget in my mind, knowing that the look on his face would make it all worthwhile. I left the cake at the restaurant where we would be dining, with their assurance that it would be presented at the completion of our meal that evening.
Well my husband was definitely thrilled with the evening I had planned, and we had a wonderful dinner celebrating his birthday and my new employment. After dinner, just as they had promised, the restaurant staff brought my special, made-to-order, paid-extra-for, cake to the table, complete with candles and singing. My husband beamed, kissed and hugged me, and then cut the cake. With a piece in front of each of us, we sat and looked at them. Then we looked at each other, and back at the pieces of cake. I lovingly told him that although I didn’t care for German Chocolate cake, I knew he loved it, and to go ahead and eat it. He seemed to freeze. He slowly turned his head towards me and asked “I love it?”
“Of course, it’s your favorite, and I’ll be happy just to watch you enjoy yourself” I replied, confident that he would adore my selfless show of love.
“But, Honey,” he stammered, hesitantly, “I don’t even like German Chocolate cake!”
And so “that’s like the German Chocolate cake” was born.